The definition of a goal is an object or an event towards which play is directed in order to score. The last six months fit into my play. I accomplished numerous goals and the score remained unchanged.
Rationalizing one’s choices based on one’s past will always look like and be the past. The infinite loop, whether it be success or failure, produces a prison without joy or accomplishment. I completed this course happily. We spent a lot of time investigating how to change our thinking. It did not make a distinction between having thoughts and ‘thinking’ as two different phenomena however. Regardless, both only and always put one eventually into cognitive dissonance. The ‘Truth’ believed is always a lie. The truth can only be an experience. It is best to ride the horse in the direction the horse is headed. I am rereading a Gerald Vann book and realized that the Presence of God, living in now, operating in a space of possibility, ‘being’ present, the space of Infinite Possibility, mindfulness, aliveness or whatever one chooses to describe the experience requires NO THINKING or having thoughts or using the cognitive functions as the source of ones being. Winston Churchill said, ‘If you’re going through hell, keep going.’ All too often, when I notice [a state of thinking] I am in ‘hell’ I stop to argue! Clearly not the path through but if I ‘notice’ the thought as an alarm clock that just began ringing I can see it is an opportunity to ‘get off it’ or go back into the ‘zone’ or presence myself to the experience. Hell then looks awe full funny or is that awfully funny.
What’s next in this space? I will make some housekeeping changes soon and I will begin building on the material I found here. I learned a lot. I gained some super insights and a couple breakthroughs that restored decades of blindness. In many ways, I am a dharma bum, someone who dabbles and investigates many different approaches while never mastering one. I have learned much in the process. All paths lead to a mountain with no top. I am after mastery.